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Dante’s Inferno, Perhaps Third Cirlce: The Gross Man
For those who don’t remember, the Dante’s Inferno series are reserved for rants and the literary banishment of those who offend Urban Odyssey bloggers. Watch out, because this post comes from the fury of Bianca. Only mildly censored so as not to ignite an internet riot.
“Dear God,
Why? Why I ask, why do certain people exist?
Picture it, a muggy Spring morning in late May. The 6:00am 2 train. Abnormally packed train for this early in the morning. Seating is limited. As I go into my usual morning trance during my 90 minute commute I am rudely interrupted by foul play. That foul play my friends is Body Odor. A 6′ 5″ inch male, approximately 40 years old, still rockin fubu hard as if they were ever cool or like they ever made anything of quality…or perhaps his Asian themed button down is a “Dragon Ball-Z” shirt. Nonetheless his shirt sucks. His jeans are visibly filthy and 2 inches too short. He is wearing crew cut socks (do they even make those anymore?) and his new balance sneakers look like his lawn mowing sneakers however somehow I doubt he has a lawn to mow. Too harsh? Well you try sitting down wind from this motherfucker standing over you with what I believe to be 2 days worth of underarm body odor. There is no escaping this. I tried plugging my nose, burying my face in my arm then my bag. Shallow breaths from my mouth did not do the trick. “Ding!” The train doors open after this 15 minute violation. He takes two steps toward what I believe will be my freedom to breath. NOPE sits right next to me. I thought for a moment the smell would die down since I was no longer right beneath his armpit. 5-4-3-2-NOPE. Dante’s Inferno, Perhaps Third Cirlce: The Gross Man – continue reading …
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funny signs
Submitted by JPLogan
Yonkers, NY October 2009
Underground talent
JPLogan asks…
Whatever happened to street performers?
“It only takes a great musician, battery powered amp, eye seeing dog and a banjo. Subway music Boston style.”
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Miami knows what’s up
This Miami sign was submitted by JPLogan, passed along from others… More smart urban planning.
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Chutes and Ladders
This story idea and link was submitted by JPLogan of NYC.
Recent salsa reflections had us commenting on gender dynamics. Here’s a look into some theory that’s out there which seeks to explain gender dynamics, from a guy who seems to have approached the male/female game as a graduate internet thesis project. It pretty much goes like this: gals keep two “ladders” where they put men: a friend ladder and a f*ck-ables ladder. Men keep one ladder and there is a hierarchy of women on the ladder based on attraction. Here is a snippet from the webpage, “Ladder Theory”: Chutes and Ladders – continue reading …
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Alien Street Cookie Arrives in Inwood via Black Hole
This find was submitted by C-mixto in Inwood, NYC
Speaking of outer space, if this isn’t Street Cookie I don’t know what is. C-mixto submitted this photo reluctantly. He is not a fan of the Street Cookie thread, but was shaken by his find and might be a new believer. This is alien Street Cookie emerging from a black hole vortex. He came across it near Academy Street in Inwood.
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“Harlem Homeland Security”
This Urban Odyssey find was submitted by Divafish, discovered two years ago in Harlem. It’s just a find, not an advocacy of opinion, so don’t get all up in arms. Gentrification is not an easy subject or phenomenon. 
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Who dropped their shopping list?
This picture was submitted by Divafish, who spotted this urban odyssey find on 125th Street and Amsterdam. Yours?
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Something fishy
This post comes from Divafish, the first of you Urban Odyssey bloggers to submit a free standing story outside of your comment boxes:
Here is a little tidbit that I found while walking around the Harlem Meer yesterday. A sign afixed to the fence next to the pond with the image of the dreaded predatory SNAKEHEAD FISH - warning anglers that if they catch such a fish in the pond so bring it to authorities immediately.
A few years ago someone threw a croc (3 feet long) in the Harlem Meer, and a real live “Crocadile Dundee” wrangler was brought in from Florida. The reptile was captured admist of media hullabaloo.
According to the park ranger we spoke to yesterday, the dreaded snakehead is supposedly “delicious”. Are New Yorkers’ playing a deadly game with nature in the Meer, or just another free meal?
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We’re coming soon…
Hey…. We’re under construction. Come back soon.
ouo
ouo@oururbanodyssey.com
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